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In the New Testament, Jesus referred to Himself as the Bridegroom. Why did He do that?  Was He just using pretty flowery language?  Paul also referred to Jesus as the Bridegroom and the church as the Bride in the book of Ephesians.  We saw in our previous post that YHWH Elohim was married to Israel at Mt. Sinai.  What is God telling us here in the New Testament about Christ and the Church?

Matthew 9:15: And Jesus said to them, “The attendants of the bridegroom cannot mourn as long as the bridegroom is with them, can they? But the days will come when the bridegroom is taken away from them, and then they will fast.

Ephesians 5:31-32 “For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and the two will become one flesh.” This is a profound mystery — but I am talking about Christ and the church.

When we better understand the ancient Jewish custom of Weddings, we can more fully appreciate some of the things that Jesus was telling us in the New Testament. Talk about adding “depth” to the Word of God!!  Everything that Jesus did and said followed this ancient Jewish custom of marriage, which is totally unknown and foreign to Christians living in the 21st century!!!

Ancient Jewish Wedding Customs….

Covenant or Contract…

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When a young man desired to marry a young woman in ancient Israel, he would prepare a contract or covenant to present to the young woman and her father at the young woman’s home. The contract showed his willingness to provide for the young woman and described the terms under which he would propose marriage. The most important part of the contract was the bride price, the price that the young man was willing to pay to marry the young woman. 

Jesus came to the home of His bride (earth) to present His marriage contract. The marriage contract provided by Jesus is the new covenant, which provides for the forgiveness of sins of God’s people. Jesus paid the bride price with His life. At the last supper, when breaking bread, He spoke of the price He was paying: 

Luke 22:19: “...This is my body given for you…”

The Cup

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If the bride price was agreeable to the young woman’s father, the young man would pour a glass of wine for the young woman. If the young woman drank the wine, it would indicate her acceptance of the proposal. At this point, the young man and young woman would be betrothed. Betrothal was legally binding, just like a marriage. The only difference was that the marriage was not yet consummated. A typical betrothal period was 1-2 years. During this time the bride and bridegroom each would be preparing for the marriage and wouldn’t see each other.

Just as the bridegroom would pour a cup of wine for the bride to drink to seal the marriage contract, so Jesus poured wine for His disciples. His words described the significance of the cup in representing the bride price for the marriage contract: 

Then He took the cup, gave thanks and offered it to them, saying, “Drink from it, all of you. This is my blood of the covenant, which is poured out for many for the forgiveness of sins. I tell you, I will not drink of this fruit of the vine from now on until that day when I drink it anew with you in my Father’s kingdom.” — Matt. 26:28-29 

The disciples drank of the cup, thus accepting the contract.

Gifts for the Bride

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Next, the bridegroom would present the bride with special gifts. The purpose of these gifts was to show the bridegroom’s appreciation of the bride. They were also intended to help her to remember him during the long betrothal period.

The gifts that Jesus gave us are the gifts of the Holy Spirit:

 We know that we live in Him and He in us, because He has given us of His Spirit 1 John 4:13.

John 14:26But the Counselor, the Holy Spirit, whom the Father will send in my name, will teach you all things and will remind you of everything I have said to you. Peace I leave with you; my peace I give you. I do not give to you as the world gives. Do not let your hearts be troubled and do not be afraid.

Mikveh

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The bride would next partake of a Mikveh, or cleansing bath. Mikveh is the same word used for baptism. To this day in conservative Judaism a bride cannot marry without a Mikveh.

The Mikveh, or baptism that Jesus provided for His bride was baptism in the Holy Spirit. 

 “Do not leave Jerusalem, but wait for the gift my Father promised, which you have heard me speak about. For John baptized with water, but in a few days you will be baptized with the Holy Spirit.” Acts 1:4.

Preparing a Place

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During the betrothal period, the bridegroom would prepare a wedding chamber for the honeymoon. This chamber was typically built in the bridegroom’s father’s house. The wedding chamber had to be a beautiful place to bring the bride. The bride and groom were to spend seven days there. The wedding chamber had to be built to the groom’s father’s specifications. The young man could go for his bride only when his father approved. If the bridegroom was asked when the wedding was to be, he might well say “it is not for me to know, only my father knows”.

Just as a bridegroom would have told his bride that he would go to prepare a place for her, so Jesus told His disciples: “

In my Father’s house are many rooms; if it were not so, I would have told you. I am going there to prepare a place for you. And if I go and prepare a place for you, I will come back and take you to be with me that you also may be where I am. John 14:1-3.

No one knows about that day or hour, not even the angels in heaven, nor the Son, but only the Father. Be on guard! Be alert ! You do not know when that time will come — Mark 13:32-33

A Waiting Bride Consecrated

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While the bridegroom was preparing the wedding chamber, the bride was considered to be consecrated, set apart or “bought with a price”. If she went out, she would wear a veil so others would know she was betrothed. During this time she prepared herself for the marriage.   She wouldn’t know when her groom would come for her, so she always had to be ready. Since bridegrooms typically came for their brides in the middle of the night, to “steal them away”, the bride would have to have her lamp and her belongings ready at all times.

At that time the kingdom of heaven will be like ten virgins who took their lamps and went out to meet the bridegroom…The foolish ones took their lamps but did not take any oil with them. The wise, however, took oil in jars along with their lamps. The bridegroom was a long time in coming, and they all became drowsy and fell asleep. “At midnight the cry rang out: ‘Here’s the bridegroom! Come out to meet him!’ “Then all the virgins woke up and trimmed their lamps. The foolish ones said to the wise, ‘Give us some of your oil; our lamps are going out.’ “‘No,’ they replied, ‘there may not be enough for both us and you. Instead, go to those who sell oil and buy some for yourselves.‘ “But while they were on their way to buy the oil, the bridegroom arrived. The virgins who were ready went in with him to the wedding banquet. And the door was shut. “Later the others also came. ‘Sir! Sir!’ they said. ‘Open the door for us!’ “But he replied, ‘I tell you the truth, I don’t know you.’ “Therefore keep watch, because you do not know the day or the hour.” (Matthew 25: 1-13)

Bridegroom Comes for His Bride

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When the bridegroom’s father deemed the wedding chamber ready, the father would tell the bridegroom that all was ready and to get His bride. The bridegroom would abduct his bride secretly, like a thief at night and take her to the wedding chamber. As the bridegroom approached the bride’s home, he would shout and blow the shofar (ram’s horn trumpet) so that she had some warning to gather her belongings to take into the wedding chamber. The bridegroom and his friends would come into the bride’s house and get the bride and her bridesmaids.

For the Lord himself will come down from heaven, with a loud command, with the voice of the archangel and with the trumpet call of God, and the dead in Christ will rise first. After that, we who are still alive and are left will be caught up together with them in the clouds to meet the Lord in the air. And so we will be with the Lord forever. Therefore encourage each other with these words. Now, brothers, about times and dates we do not need to write to you, for you know very well that the day of the Lord will come like a thief in the night.1 Thessalonians 4:16-17.

Seven Days in Wedding Chamber

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The bridegroom would take his bride to the wedding chamber where they would spend seven days. The bridegroom’s friend would wait outside the door of the wedding chamber. When the marriage was consummated, the bridegroom would tell his friend through the door, and the friend would announce it to the assembled guests. The guests would celebrate for seven days until the bride and bridegroom emerged from the wedding chamber.

Ancient Jewish eschatology taught that a seven year “time of trouble” would come upon the earth before the coming of the Messiah (Daniel’s 70th week). During that time of trouble, the righteous would be resurrected and would enter the wedding chamber where they would be protected from the time of trouble. Today that seven year period is referred to as the tribulation.

Marriage Supper

After seven days in the wedding chamber, the bride and bridegroom would emerge and participate in a feast with friends and family. There would be joyous celebrating during this feast. The feast would conclude the wedding celebration.

Then I heard what sounded like a great multitude, like the roar of rushing waters and like loud peals of thunder, shouting: “Hallelujah! For our Lord God Almighty reigns. Let us rejoice and be glad and give him glory! For the wedding of the Lamb has come, and his bride has made herself ready. Fine linen, bright and clean, was given her to wear.” (Fine linen stands for the righteous acts of the saints.) Then the angel said to me, “Write: ‘Blessed are those who are invited to the wedding supper of the Lamb!'” — Revelation 19:6-9.

Depart for Home

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After the marriage supper, the bride and bridegroom would leave the groom’s father’s house where the groom had built the wedding chamber. They would go to their own home, which the bridegroom had prepared.

Then I saw a new heaven and a new earth, for the first heaven and the first earth had passed away, and there was no longer any sea. I saw the Holy City, the new Jerusalem, coming down out of heaven from God, prepared as a bride beautifully dressed for her husband. And I heard a loud voice from the throne saying, “Now the dwelling of God is with men, and he will live with them. They will be his people, and God himself will be with them and be their God. He will wipe every tear from their eyes... One of the seven angels who had the seven bowls full of the seven last plagues came and said to me, “Come, I will show you the bride, the wife of the Lamb.” And he carried me away in the Spirit to a mountain great and high, and showed me the Holy City, Jerusalem, coming down out of heaven from God. — Revelation 21:1-4.